Today whilst reading the newspaper I glanced at the date and realised that it is the date of my first marriage which was solemnised on the 10th of June 1977, when I was eighteen years old. Memories are as you desire them to be, depending on the philosophies that guide your life. I was immediately infused with a delight of remembrances and a reverie that holds an openness of recollection without recrimination, blame or regret. I know for a fact that my life has been guided by intellectual parameters that insisted of me to find much wider spaces of comprehension to everything I engaged with, rather than to fit myself into a small corner of mere survival and existence, because life sometimes knocks you down or because you encounter fear.
It is the space of self-perception within which sharp critique must resonate if we are to use time effectively in the cycle of our lives. Time to maximise learning by honing skills tirelessly is what will determine real liberty and growth. But this is not something that occurs merely from armchair philosophising and rhetoric alone, much as it may be a great feel-good factor for self esteem. The truth of success comes from trashing self-pity into oblivion and setting small targets that piece a long trajectory of sustainable vision on a map of must-do's! There is no substitute for hard work and as I look back today on my journey of living and learning, I am pleased by the tenacity I possessed to stretch time to its maximum bursting point, and pack in (many times exhaustively!) experiences of work and family with no compromises on either front.
Life knocks everybody about with no exception. Therefore it is foolish to waste time fussing and fretting over things that maybe painful, because it doesn't produce anything positive. Every one gets emotionally hurt. This is what being human is all about unfortunately. I deal with this by letting my hurt surface within my consciousness and question its origins. If I find no areas that can effectively be erased by negotiation, discourse, active intervention or addressing methodologies of change and atonement, then I aggressively whack it soundly out of my purview ….and if it pops up again (which happens with memories that are painful), then I go through my whacking routine again…..and again ….and again…and again! Like a pesky insect you finally do get rid of it and then occupy yourself with much more enlightened preoccupations that duly merit attention.
I am grateful for comprehending how privileged I am. I am consistently reminded everyday of this from the many stories and situations in India that hold pain and tragedy that appears crushingly devastating and dehumanising. And yet in many such instances you encounter such immense courage and bravery where people desire to move on and not be defeated.
Teachings come from where you choose to find them. From great literature and cinema, and from discourses that challenge one to re-examine and contemplate. I have had such amazing opportunities to be taught by people of great wisdom who offered me through their belief and time, legacies I feel proud to have shared and to belong within; and which crafted my abilities to keep the ripple of learning ever expanding. Most importantly my wings of freedom come from the teachings that have influenced me to recognise the immense value of liberal thinking that rejects orthodoxy and conservatism. I learnt early on to define what that difference must mean and to live my life with pride by the governance of its principles at all times.
It isn't necessarily easy, but what great joy it brings!
