Curtain call.

Indians could well take a lesson from the western world in observing the collective endeavour of honouring their heroes. We instead prefer to wash our dirty linen in public to establish the difference of our opinion, believing this to be a democratic necessity. Was the farewell to Michael Jackson too much of a hoopla with commercial agendas as some of the reasons behind it ? Perhaps. But what it also helped to create was a space in the minds of people, where his achievements as a performer and entertainer could be remembered and celebrated. Where his contribution to the music world could finally cast aside forever the shadows of other memories less honourable, and that his final curtain call commanded the attention of the world.

Compassion seems less evidenced in the world today. Maybe because the world is a tougher place and we are apprehensive that such sentiments may be assumed by others as sign of weakness? I don't know. But I do feel grateful when situations offers me the chance to embrace compassion, as I know it to be an emotion that brings out a mediation that rejects the negative energies we can possess.

The good in others should be acknowledged with an open heartedness. We search too much for praise and never comprehend that our own goodness may be explored by recognising it in the other. As an artist I know of so many Indian artists and entertainers whose memories have faded from our minds because we have not cared to honour their contribution. Instead we have our politicians erecting mammoth statues to immortalise themselves. What a disgrace to our cultural heritage!

Good House keeping!

I have a simple principle in life. Be honest about what you want and then manage it without any over due fanfare. I have a wonderful staff who keeps the efficiency and order of maintenance well orchestrated in our rather rambling home, and I feel privileged to have their skills contribute to the overall vision of our lives as a family.

The first rule to keep in every home is to have only what suits you. This should include the aesthetics that governs the space because if a home environment does not appeal to you, then you will be unable to feel comforted under its roof. A home should also not become a junk yard. Clear up and let go!

Create an order for yourself which is practical. Use your calender to make a detailed timetable of chores that allows a system of functioning to be set into place that does not require your personal attention at all times. Learn to delegate responsibilities, and supervise without interference. Use the method of departmentalising a home so that you perceive it's running to be that of an office space. This mind set helps greatly in allowing you to organise in a more detailed manner, and anticipate rather than becaught off guard.

I have a number of lists which facilitate coordination for home management. These lists, at a press of a button, can be altered or added to, making the organising of all things very simple for me. Important contacts are kept accessible to all and instructions for emergencies well tabulated. My larder is stocked with items that are standardized. I am a creature of habit within such domains, and keep my adventurous spirit for other areas of life!

A home is normally a shared collective space and so basic house rules should be structured so that all who share the space know how to contribute to its functioning. This preserves a sense of consideration for all concerned which I believe is a valuable component to have within a home.

Cleanliness and order are easy to achieve if procrastination doesn't become the name of the game. Dis-allow yourself to be ruled by a perpetual back-log of work and instead preserve your freedom by keeping pace with the reality of your existence. If home is truly where your heart is, then don't do anything in half measures. Do things well and always by your own capability. That will be the best yardstick to keep.

A new day, a new challenge....Good Morning!

Some days are difficult days at work. Yesterday was one such day for me in my studio. I had more paint daubs on my body and on the floor than where they needed to be, and my hand felt clumsy and my coordination seemed to have taken a vacation without my consent! This total disarray of order spelt the turmoil of my struggle and I must have looked a pretty sight as I wielded my brush with the zeal of a stubborn novice whilst my brain sent out silent speech bubbles with expletives that would have made a sailor blush! On such a day things that normally are effortless suddenly become challenges that take you into a battle field, and at the end of the day you walk away from it all feeling tired and exhausted, yet perversely satisfied. Strange as it may seem to others, it is these interludes of agonising conflict for artists that become significant encounters of genuine learning.

Contradictory? No not at all. Because these moments of rupture within the composure of ones work are necessary to hold the alertness of intention and which keeps complacency at bay. Situations from the studio that are demanding are a result of the enquiry upon which we formulate our concepts as artists. Many of us work a 7 day week when we are not travelling, and we continuously stretch ourselves to find a visual articulation that holds the power of conviction, and the magic of our aesthetic moorings. The delight of conquering the many demons of doubt, and wrestling with ones own ineptness to resolves and create coherence, is an experience that all artists know the worth of. Today I am back in my studio, and all fired up to grapple with my painting that stares back at me with many questions unanswered. I love the doubts and uncertainty that unsettle my stomach and the knowledge that it will be finally only me that can find the answers and bring it to a conclusion.

Have a great day, because I know I am going to have one !

A half open bloom.....

Yesterday my friend saved the life of a child. This boy left his mothers hand and began to run across the road into the middle of rush hour traffic on a main road in Baroda. Without thinking twice, and not bothering about her own life, my friend seeing a car speeding towards the child rushed into the middle of the road and grabbed the child and tumbled with him to safety. Whilst doing this she was hit from behind by a scooter and has torn a ligament in her leg as a consequence. The child merely had some skin abrasions that were minor. My friend thankfully has got off lightly in her act of heroism, because she could very well have been fatally injured if not killed. When we talk of unsung heroes, these are the people we are referring to, who in an instant can put their lives at risk to save another without any hesitation or regret. We are so proud of you dear friend.

But not everyone has the humanness with which to fan the spirit of life with the desire to keep it alive. Today to learn that a policeman killed a young man who was being argumentative and provocative in action with him, instead of shooting him in the leg, seems so absurd in contract to the spontaneous act of saving the life of another that my friend did unasked. It appears that those who need to be the saviours and who we invested with the power to intervene with wisdom in troubled times, are the people who too often are incapable of responsibility and can be destructive in their actions.

On the same day: two stories, two people, two different philosophies. I know who my role model is!

Farewell to a loved one.

Dear Tyeb Mehta,

I remember how you faithfully came to each of my shows when I was a young artist, starting my career. Quiet and unassuming, you always had something encouraging to say to me, and your gentle eyes would offer a comfort and understanding that was far more eloquent than words could have ever been. Too young to articulate what those brief interludes meant to me in those days, and in later years not wanting to sound sentimental or ingratiating, I never thanked you for giving to my generation a legacy that taught us so much, and for the generosity of your belief.

In the new hype of art and the artist becoming page 3 fodder, you stood so singularly apart from all the drama of playing the celebrity game, and with your quiet dignity maintained the privacy of your art practice with a focus that steered it away from becoming commodified by the agendas of others. You were a living legend Sir, and no book of Indian art history would be complete without your inclusion.

Rest in peace and know that your spirit will live with us forever through the amazing creative contribution you leave to us, as your gift to the nation.

Thank you Tyeb.

In gratitude and love,

Rekha Rodwittiya

Make it women's day every day!

I have watched many of my women friends get more overwhelmed as their lives proceed, especially when they enter the third decade of life which brings with it an over load of responsibilities and pressures. This comes in the guise of professional stress, greater domestic management, child supervision, aging parents who may have health issues and need special care or who live with you and curtail your independence unknowingly or in the case of many insist on not moving in with their children who then end up scuttling between cities to support these "acts of independence". Amidst all this and more, women continue to strive to keep a zone of nurturing for themselves. The personal needs of women often get ignored in the cacophony of other demands, and what angers me intensely is the history of guilt that women continue to umbrella themselves with whenever they break down. We are not auditioning for the role of super woman, and the stress of life is not a fictitious film fantasy either.

Woman need a solid infra structure of support and friendship. I am hugely fortunate in having the greatest energy boosters in friends who hold me up, lend me a hand and poke me into shape! I am able to realise and live my life with a better understanding of who I want to be because I do not see myself as alone on this journey, and utilize this tremendous collective pool of belief to help me on my way. Friendships should never be competitive. Power has no place in this vulnerable area of sharing , where trust and respect are the invisible threads that weave a safety net for one another.

Lets first establish that it is not uncommon to feel like the walls are closing in on one, or your mind feels crowded or like an over stuffed cupboard. Each of us have those days, some more acutely than others. What is imperative is to take a moment to stop whatever you are doing and acknowledge to yourself you need a break. Even the tiniest sliver of time for yourself makes a world of difference. Place yourself as supremely important in that moment, even if it is just to close your eyes and rest! Don't hesitate to speak with a friend, unburden yourself, cry, laugh.... and just let all the negative energy of stress and pain release itself. Let it flow away...... and trust me it will.

Women need to also change their attitudes regarding themselves. Feel special about yourself, its not a crime! Demand attention, you deserve it! Indulge in things that matter to you without apprehension; and for crying out aloud please throw away for ever the over load of guilt that is carried around by our gender for no logical reason! Let us not allow the pain of a past to haunt us unnecessarily and let us instead attempt to determine a present which is acceptable to each of us in our individual lives, so that our future is one which has been invested in consciously.

Knock-knock, whose there?

Letting go of an unhealthy relationship isn't the easiest thing in life. Though we intellectually comprehend it to be necessary, on so many occasions we still find ourselves holding on with some illogical explanation to comfort ourselves with, as we cling on to old ways because the effort to walk away requires greater courage. Reconsidering isn't a sign of weakness as it calls for inner wisdom to be analytical and self-critical, and thereby not allow emotion to hinder one's better judgement. I have had to acknowledge when situations I considered touch stones of certainty have proven to have out lived their value, and are no longer nurturing the life journey I hold important, and painful as it maybe, trying to repair or alter the unchangeable is in such instances a pointless exercise.

Flexibility is crucial in all friendships. However too many silent compromises often leads people to misread such acts of considerations and sacrifice, and assumptions are made that are inaccurate. Friendships are undeniably complex territories and therefore require great effort from all involved to make them viable spaces of positive engagement. I firmly believe that well determined lines of what is permissible and what is not should be clearly articulated by all parties involved and respected at all times, without exception. From my own experiences I have found that the old saying that opposites attract is in fact an absolute fallacy. Things of importance must be common, and the personal politics that motivates ones deeds must be of value and respected, by those who interact with you.

I have recently walked away from a an old friendship. It had begun to evidence the chasm of difference over the last decade that I ignored because it was always nostalgia for the past, from which this friendship had come, which coaxed me to over look issues that troubled me. And then one day the cracks became too wide to be ignored and it was suddenly far too exhaustive to find the energy to repair these troubled areas once again. I blame only myself for not having the courage to admit that there was more that separated us philosophically than could ever hold us together, and to have realised that memories alone of a shared childhood are not substantial enough to bridge the obvious differences of the intellectual worlds we inhabit as adults.

I am of course saddened by the loss because emotionally I believed we belonged forever in the embrace of that special childhood friendship. But I am equally relieved to be free of the burden of trying to fit into a mould that I began to suspect no longer held my imprint many moons ago. For me the wonderful memories of this long association, of which there are many, hold the spirit of genuine tenderness of youthful struggle and aspirations shared; and I know that in recalling this when I miss my friend as I know I will, can guide me to preserve the essential goodness that this friendship was constructed from, even as we both walk away towards the different directions our lives need us to take today.