Wednesday, 9 May 2012

Sandesh and Kentucky fried chicken.....

Ok this is how it must have gone in Kolkata recently ....
Baby's day out! Choo chweet !

First things first.  Didiji's appearance for meeting Hillarydi was looked into...carefully. Important no?!
Jet black dye for hair....purchased. Only Indian please. No L'oreal nonsense. Apply liberally. Now this comes under D'da's department. After all, curly haired babu-baba has truly best experience to advise here on matters of progress and development of hair. Also no need for mirror for didi no?! (see good budget costing). Only have to peer into HUGE specs to see reflection as Dereck baba skips along side for providing quiz questions, so that didi will dazzle foreign guest! Also will give free Bournvita  if Hillarydi starts looking sleepless over bong-bong razzle-dazzle tamasha of we are better than the Karat-carrots who did not have diamond value anyway, only carrot stick tricks. Silly-silly big bindi-bindi can not make you have people power na?!....what you need is boom-boom voice and muscle power of thuggies so that others wear huggies because they are scared shitless! Practical common sense our didi has no?! lets not waste time on altu-faltu digressions.

How does our foreign didi manage things. Comparisons make us feel equal no. That's why new vagina creams and washes to make us fairer down there no?! It is all for I-show-you-you-show-me cultural exchanges that make global-wobal real-real for us. Now Hillarydi will always look like she took her clothes out of Billji's closet, and then scurried away with whatever came into her grasp because too many skeletons were rattling  about when she opened the cupboard! So ill fitting pants and ugly shirts with bad hair days will be the photo album of memories for grand children. Becharas! 

Hillarydi should also learn to do genuine-genuine smiley-smiley. Really I am telling you, don't mind please. Learn no from Kateben who gave such nice photo opps from Palace balcony, wearing white wedding dress even though already doing naughty-naughty before marriage! Now our didiji she wears white sari no?....because our didi is PURE. No hanky-panky, sexy stuff please! We are serious Indian politician lady in pure Gandhi Khadi sari who wields a cat-o'-nine to quell any dissent! wonder Dereck babu-baba looks blush-washy after behind the doors session with CMji! 

Now what gifts do you think these ladies exchanged....? 

I heard that didiji got the pandalwalas to make BIG  statue  (so that other didi of UP fame understands that she too has got good cultural knowledge of sculpture OK?!) of Hillarydi sitting on a tiger. Only this tiger was really a pussy cat  with Billji's face.  So clever no?! 

Hillarydi from her side got didiji some perfume to cover-up the sweaty-sweaty smells of too much dadagiri in prisons.... Real asli Channel to channel energies into more constructive purposes like supporting nuclear deal.....wah-wah...such clever strategies ....

I am thinking both sisters cried when leaving each other. Strong outside.....but soft-soft inside no....nobody understands these girls. They got on so well, plastic smiles and all, that they have plans to vacation somewhere together, I heard. Toy-boy fun time....sssssh don't tell, no. Secret-secret. All hush-hush and no puppies.  FBI are now searching for tall dark and handsome recruits under 25 years of age. Body guards man. No chance for Schwarzenegger to get secret agent role here unfortunately. Shriver baby may become part of toy-boy sisterhood where no nannies are allowed, and Oprahji will make interview with blessings of Deepakbhai! I also heard that didi has already packed the cat-o'-nine in her new Louis Vuitton  luggage....and Hillarydi is taking the starch out of her panties!

I think the Bermuda triangle will have another meaning very soon!!!!

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