Wednesday, 25 August 2010

My Yin and Yang

I have a bronchial infection for over six weeks now, and blocked sinus cavities that makes me sound like a motorcycle with no silencer as I splutter and trumpet about the house! Feeling a bit rung out of energy my body became tired and uncooperative to my will; yet my mind however insisted on doing double time with me even in this state of near collapse. It is a strange feeling to be exhausted and physically drained, and yet have the mind relentlessly hyper alert. On the few occasions of surgery I have undergone, where general anesthetic has been administered, I have always experienced regaining consciousness before the surgical procedures are complete. Here too for those few moments (fractional as they maybe) before the sedation is re-administered, my mind is razor sharp and lucid; whilst the body in contrast is completely shut down and unresponsive to my will.

For many years I consciously trained my body to adapt to less sleep; and then of course the instinctive alertness of motherhood takes away "the sleep of the dead" from you forever. What occurs from need becomes habit with time, and so perhaps these are some of the factors that disallow my mind and body to synchronize themselves into compatible rhythms of co-existence.

Like a path in autumn : no sooner is it cleared than it is once again littered with fallen leaves.
Franz Kafka - the zurau aphorisms

Perhaps the tranquility and stillness of my studio acts as the complimentary factor for these energies inside of my head; and the balance of who I am gets held within this strange equation of quiet and tumultuous.

Two tasks of the beginning of life: to keep reducing your circle, and to keep making sure you're not hiding somewhere outside it.
Frank Kafka - the zurau aphorisms


  1. Wishing you a complete physical recovery.
    May I suggest a grand mother's remedy which really works? Soonth (dried ginger powder) and Ashwagandh powder mixed together in equal quanities.One tsp twice a day with warm milk and honey has never been inefficient in eliminating bronchial infections and muscular pain. These products are available at all unani medical stores and are not incompatible with allopathic medecine. Most members of my family, including children take this, believe me, the result is that we have not taken antibiotics nor cortisol for ages. Hope you give this a try.

  2. Looking forward to having you back on your feet again. It amused me to see that the lost 'd' found itself in 'boy' once again! Jokes apart, please keep in mind that without physical fitness, even the very strong mind and spirit begin to do look after yourself.