Thursday, 4 February 2010

Paint the slate clean!

Someone should tell the Thackeray brothers to get a life! One cousin sounds more stupid than the other, and whenever I hear them airing their views on TV on regional politics and national issues of concern, I am always inclined to believe I am watching a very bad comedy show with TRP ratings that are surely bombing them off the screens forever! As for the old supremo Bal Saheb Thackeray; well he looks like a C grade bollywood villain who should team up with Dev Anand and do a film titled "Old men who cannot retire gracefully"! This of course will be directed by Karan Johar and be produced by Shahrukh Khan. KJ will then inadvertently refer to Mumbai as Bombay when chatting chirpily on the tomato ketchup couch with Koel, and then issue a thousand apologies for not minding his language! Shahrukh Khan will stand as the self appointed global icon and seriously be serious about serious issues of serious concern that seriously need to seriously be seriously addressed by serious people. Foreign policy on Indo-Pak relations will now belong to the sports ministry, as all talks on bi-lateral relations can only be conducted via cricket and hockey and volleyball and tennis .....and by the way Chidhambaram will be the sports minister. In any case he looks the part since he is always dressed in white, and looks like a deligent sports coach these days.

The girls from Bihar colleges will want Rahul Gandhi to wear a toga not because they really believe that the Rome putra must be true to his ancestry, but because they will get to see a little more flesh of their gora-gora -dimpy-do poster boy! Rahul Mahajan on the other hand can take over the PR of the BJP wala's and teach them a thing or two on kiss and tell subjects.

Amar Singh and his two twin sisters Jaya I and Jaya II can entertain us with more dimpled simpering smiles and photo opportunities of smiling brother with loving sisters, a la Yash Chopra cinema style of Silsila soft focus and tear jerking sentimentality fame. Since good old Mayavati has decided that Phoolan Devi's shoes must be filled and dadagiri is the new pink equation, Mulayamsingh is still being kept as the cuddly teddy bear amongst the three siblings to comfort them when the lights go out and they are all alone in the dark. Scary, scary, baba!!!! No rocking bullacart this missy Jaya II; its the cradle this time, and down we all fall!

And poor Omar Abdhulla didn't quite realise that sitting in the hot seat as CM gets hot quite literally, especially if your father has rattling skeletons in his cupboard and imagines each day is Halloween party night and parades them around without too much consideration for the weak and faint hearted! Boom-boom, bang-bang, can really mean anything today from great sex to a ragging war on a battle field; and handing out awards can get a little puzzling amidst all this confusing activity, especially if you have downed a chota peg too many.

I am seriously (yes very seriously) thinking of establishing a political party. Since I have abstained from the cocktail party circuit in Baroda, I think party hopping should not be something I miss out on completely in life; especially seeing what fun our netaji's have in parliament by punching and taking pot shots at each other. Exactly what a good pub brawl is all about dears. You have sex, money and scandals galore, and infidelity and heart ache, all there for the taking; especially the money! Sounds like so much fun and frolic! So watch out, Rekhaji of Kishkindah party invites membership from all and sundry. Criteria to be selected: brainless idiots with no scruples and pompous to boot will get first preference. I of course will stencil a monkey on my forehead as the symbol of energy and dance through the streets of Baroda singing songs (Joan Baez please) of revolution and change!

1 comment:

  1. Kishkindha Party ki jai.......Rekha, I will be one of those volunteers to be enrolled in as I deem myself to have some level of intelligence. As you said throughout the posting, whatever happening in the politico-cultural scenario of India today is an absolute farce, which could happen only a 'serious' tragedy. It questions the minimum IQ levels of any common man like me and I wonder why a few street smart hooligans like Raj, Udhav and the good old Bal (all Thackerays) be allowed to say whatever they want, especially after going through the harrowing experience of 20th century Nazi History.

    The Indian political system still follows the appeasing policy established by our Chacha Nehru. Hence the Sainkis and Nava Nirman guys just get away with their sayings. Had the Indian political system been tough enough and never resorted to the vote bank politics, these guys would have been behind bars in no time.

    Now, the most hilarious thing is the Mr.Rahul Gandhi is flown in to Mumbai by a chopper and it would land in a private property. The reason is that the trade unions in Bombay Airport is controlled by Sena leadership!

    Our leagal system bundle up any muslim boy for thinking freely and accuse him being a terrorist. But the Thackerays who brashly do their 'anti-national' and 'terror' speach, they are given huge media space.

    My request is that the government of India should show some guts by throwing these guys into dungeons. They dont need any better treatement.

    once again Kishkindha Party ki jai...