I have watched many of my women friends get more overwhelmed as their lives proceed, especially when they enter the third decade of life which brings with it an over load of responsibilities and pressures. This comes in the guise of professional stress, greater domestic management, child supervision, aging parents who may have health issues and need special care or who live with you and curtail your independence unknowingly or in the case of many insist on not moving in with their children who then end up scuttling between cities to support these "acts of independence". Amidst all this and more, women continue to strive to keep a zone of nurturing for themselves. The personal needs of women often get ignored in the cacophony of other demands, and what angers me intensely is the history of guilt that women continue to umbrella themselves with whenever they break down. We are not auditioning for the role of super woman, and the stress of life is not a fictitious film fantasy either.
Woman need a solid infra structure of support and friendship. I am hugely fortunate in having the greatest energy boosters in friends who hold me up, lend me a hand and poke me into shape! I am able to realise and live my life with a better understanding of who I want to be because I do not see myself as alone on this journey, and utilize this tremendous collective pool of belief to help me on my way. Friendships should never be competitive. Power has no place in this vulnerable area of sharing , where trust and respect are the invisible threads that weave a safety net for one another.
Lets first establish that it is not uncommon to feel like the walls are closing in on one, or your mind feels crowded or like an over stuffed cupboard. Each of us have those days, some more acutely than others. What is imperative is to take a moment to stop whatever you are doing and acknowledge to yourself you need a break. Even the tiniest sliver of time for yourself makes a world of difference. Place yourself as supremely important in that moment, even if it is just to close your eyes and rest! Don't hesitate to speak with a friend, unburden yourself, cry, laugh.... and just let all the negative energy of stress and pain release itself. Let it flow away...... and trust me it will.
Women need to also change their attitudes regarding themselves. Feel special about yourself, its not a crime! Demand attention, you deserve it! Indulge in things that matter to you without apprehension; and for crying out aloud please throw away for ever the over load of guilt that is carried around by our gender for no logical reason! Let us not allow the pain of a past to haunt us unnecessarily and let us instead attempt to determine a present which is acceptable to each of us in our individual lives, so that our future is one which has been invested in consciously.
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